Let’s Talk About Sleep Training

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Age: 18-24›Age: 25-34›Age: 35-44›Age: 45+›

Let me talk to you about sleep training, honestly, the way I wish someone had talked to me. If you are reading this at 2am with a baby who will not stay asleep, running on a few broken hours yourself, I want you to know two things right away: you are not failing, and you are not alone.

I am Rachel Rothman, co-founder of Betteroo. For 15 years I was the Chief Technologist at the Good Housekeeping Institute, where my whole job was testing thousands of products and asking one question: does this actually solve a real problem for real people? I have been a featured expert on Good Morning America, the Today Show, and CBS Mornings. I am also a mom of three.

And when I became a mom, I could not find sleep support that spoke to my experience as an exhausted parent. Everything was built around perfect schedules and a textbook baby. Nothing was designed for the parent running on empty at 3am, second-guessing every choice, terrified that helping my baby sleep might cost me the closeness I loved most. So I built what I wished had existed. That is Betteroo.

What I learned, from the science and from tens of thousands of families since, is that better sleep is possible without any approach that feels wrong to you. Sleep training does not have to mean cry-it-out. It does not have to mean ignoring your instincts. And it absolutely does not have to mean doing this alone. Let me show you what the research actually says, what it does not, and how Betteroo builds a plan around your baby and your comfort level, for about a dollar a day.

See your baby’s personalized sleep plan

Tell us your age to start your free 3-minute quiz. Your plan is built around your baby’s age, temperament, and your parenting style.

Age: 18-24›Age: 25-34›Age: 35-44›Age: 45+›

Plans start at just $1/day. 30-day money-back guarantee.

Why baby sleep matters so much

Before we talk about training, it helps to remember why we are doing any of this. Sleep is not a luxury for a developing baby, it is fuel.

• ✓Sleep helps a baby’s brain mature and consolidate memories.¹
• ✓Babies with more consolidated night sleep tend to show higher cognitive scores.⁶
• ✓Well-rested babies are often described as more approachable, more adaptable, and easier to soothe.¹
• ✓Good sleep supports the physical and mental health of the whole family, parents included.^3,4,5

Research shows that sleep training works

This is the part I needed to hear when I was unsure. A landmark review examined 52 separate treatment studies and concluded that behavioral sleep approaches “produce reliable and durable changes in bedtime problems and night wakings in infants and young children,” and that “an overwhelming majority of children respond favorably to these behavioral techniques, resulting in not only better sleep, but also improvements in child and family well-being.”¹

Read that last part again: not just better sleep, but a better-functioning family. A more recent randomized controlled trial confirmed it, with gentle graduated methods helping babies fall asleep and stay asleep, and the benefits holding up over time.²

And no, most babies will not simply outgrow it on their own, or at least not soon. As pediatric sleep specialists point out, some children do grow out of sleep struggles, but it can take a very long time, and a significant number do not get better without support. You are allowed to make things better now, rather than waiting it out for months or years.

Research shows that sleep training does not harm your baby

I know the real fear, because I had it too. Will this hurt my baby? The honest, evidence-based answer is no. In a randomized controlled trial, gentle sleep training “provides significant sleep benefits, yet has no adverse stress responses or long-term effects on child emotions and behavior.”²

It goes further than simply “no harm.” Broken, deprived sleep is itself stressful on a small body. Researchers measured infant stress through salivary cortisol and found it was actually slightly lower in the babies who were gently sleep trained than in those who were not.⁷

The strongest long-term evidence is a five-year follow-up of children whose families used behavioral sleep methods as babies. Researchers found no lasting differences in emotional health, behavior, the parent-child relationship, or stress compared with families who did not.³ The worry is real and valid. The lasting harm is simply not there in the data.

It helps to know where the fear even comes from. As Dr. Craig Canapari, director of the Yale Pediatric Sleep Center, explains, the idea that sleep training harms children was largely borrowed from older research on severely neglected and institutionalized children, and then misapplied to ordinary, loving families helping a well-cared-for baby learn to sleep. The researchers behind that original work later clarified that it does not apply here. Gently supporting your baby to sleep is nothing like neglect, and the evidence treats them as the completely different things they are.

And it does not damage your bond

This was my deepest fear, so let me be clear about it. The research shows the opposite of what we are afraid of. A review by the American Academy of Family Physicians found that “the security of child-parent attachment was not different among the sleep training or non-sleep training groups.”⁷ Study after study finds no difference in the parent-child bond between babies who are sleep trained and those who are not.

And here is the part that surprised me most: many parents report feeling closer to their baby, not further away, because they finally have the rest to be present, patient, and warm during the day.

Research shows it helps you, too

When babies sleep better, parents do better. A randomized controlled trial found that a simple infant sleep intervention both improved infant sleep and reduced symptoms of maternal depression.⁴ A separate study found meaningful reductions in postnatal depression, anxiety, and stress after a sleep intervention.⁵

This is the part of the story I care about most, and it is the reason Betteroo asks about you first. Getting sleep back is not only about your baby. It is about you feeling like yourself again.

Why Betteroo is different

Most sleep advice is written for a textbook baby, then hands you a generic PDF. Betteroo starts with your actual baby and your actual family, and it adapts as they grow. Here is what that means in practice.

And it is a fraction of the cost of a private consultant. Sleep consultants typically charge $500 to $2,000. Betteroo plans start at just $1 a day, with unlimited caregiver sharing and a 30-day money-back guarantee. You can compare the common sleep training methods and see how a personalized plan chooses the gentlest one that fits you.

Sleep training is a choice, and it is yours

I want to be honest with you, the way Betteroo always tries to be. Sleep training is not right for every family, and if it is not right for yours, that is completely okay. There is no single correct way to help your baby sleep, and there is no prize for doing it the hard way.

That is exactly why Betteroo never pushes one method on you. Your plan is built around what you are comfortable with, from fully responsive, no-separation settling to more gradual steps, and it is always yours to adjust. You stay in control. We stay in your corner. And if a newborn approach with no sleep training at all is what fits your family right now, that is exactly what your plan will reflect.

Build your plan now

It takes 3 minutes and it is free to see. Start by choosing your age.

Age: 18-24›Age: 25-34›Age: 35-44›Age: 45+›

Plans start at just $1/day. 30-day money-back guarantee.

Real parents, real before and after

These are real Betteroo families, in their own words. Names are anonymized, the sleep changes are exactly as parents described them. You can read many more reviews here.

Backed by real experts

Every Betteroo plan is grounded in child development science and reviewed by our experts, so the guidance you get at 2am is guidance you can trust. You can meet our full expert team, including a developmental psychologist, a licensed clinical social worker, and pediatric therapy advisors.

Rachel Rothman

Co-Founder & Chief Parenting Officer

Former Chief Technologist at the Good Housekeeping Institute for 15 years, with a mechanical engineering degree from UPenn. Featured expert on Good Morning America, the Today Show, and CBS Mornings. Published author and mom of three.

Dr. Meidad Greenberg, MD

Pediatric Medical Advisor

Board-certified pediatrician and pediatric nephrologist, fellowship-trained at Albert Einstein College of Medicine and Children’s Hospital at Montefiore. Award-winning medical educator, published researcher, and father of three.

Your sleep training questions, answered

Ready to get sleep, and yourself, back?

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Age: 18-24›Age: 25-34›Age: 35-44›Age: 45+›

Plans start at just $1/day. 30-day money-back guarantee.

This article is for informational purposes and is not medical advice. Betteroo aligns every plan with safe sleep guidance. If you have questions about your child, please reach out to your pediatrician.